The child does not want to learn what to do: the advice of a psychologist to identify and eliminate 13 different causes

In the search for reasons why a child does not want to learn, the explanations and advice of a psychologist help. The question does not make sense, despite the development of technologies, programs and a change in the view of the learning system as a whole.
What to do if the child does not want to study

5 reasons for not wanting to learn how to read and write from preschoolers

So, what if the child does not want to study? Families differ for many reasons, children - even more so. But the problem of children's learning is acute almost everywhere. At one parents the child does not read and does not want in 5 years, at others the son the teenager does not wish to study and school visits only under threat of deprivation of the computer and pocket money.

Typical causes of a child's unwillingness to learn:

  1. Poor vision.
  2. Incorrectly selected literature for reading.
  3. Adults did not read a fairy tale to a child, or they did not do it with sufficient expressiveness.
  4. The reading process itself is difficult.
  5. Insufficient development
    of fine motor skills for writing.
Psychologist-educator Ekaterina Krivosheeva, Moscow If a teenager does not want to learn the advice of a psychologist

If a child of 5-6 years does not want to learn to read and write, this is not a reason for panic.

It is important not to press on him, but in a game form to draw his attention to reading: pick up an interesting book, learn to draw letters together and recognize them in a literal.

And do not be nervous when strangers interfere with questions and advice. "

If a teenager does not want to study, the advice of a psychologist advises you to have patience, to continue to love the child, despite the negative behavior and by all means to maintain mutual trust in the family, not allowing only disrespect to oneself.

8 reasons why a child does not want to study at school

Problem Solution method
Teacher Determination of cause of conflict, support for oppressed side
Classmates Child support but maximum non-interference
Boredom Motivation formation for training
Subject If discipline is important - help inDevelopment
Protest Establishing family relationships
Health Compliance with work and rest regime or changing the curriculum / school
Perfectionism Observance of the trainee's interests;A non-price approach to the
question. The curriculum. A sensible choice based on the child's abilities or a change in the

program / school. Let's take a closer look at the reasons why the child does not want to study each item.

The problem with the teacher

The child does not want to go to school In the unwillingness to learn can be the teacher's fault. But before blaming the teacher, it is better to study the conflict

. The open form of the conflict ( mostly in the senior school classes) or the fear of unfairness on the part of the adult( preschoolers and pupils of junior and middle classes).

We need to understand the causes of the incident. Perhaps the teacher crossed the border, humiliating the student with the whole class or slandering anything.

If the subject is important, and no understanding with the teacher was found, there are two options: to insist on replacing the teacher( this is possible if the class has similar situations with other children) or to change the school.

Sometimes the cause of the conflict is the student, deliberately provoking the teacher. And before you protect your child from an adult, you need to understand who needs protection.

Children's permissiveness has acquired in other cases a threatening scale, which is condoned by modern legislation that regulates the sphere of these relationships.

Problems in dealing with classmates

The reason why children do not want to go to school is often related to their relationship in the classroom. Children are cruel, and the word hurts for years.

Do not try to devalue the problem in the eyes of the child. The task of the parent is to provide maximum support and understanding of the home, in the family. The sense of security with confidential communication with the family will help the child to behave more confidently in the children's team.

Despite understandable parental sympathy, it is only possible to intervene in the conflict if it is a direct threat to children's health or the psyche.


A child will get bored if he knows the content of the lesson. The pace of mastering an object in a person is individual, the curriculum for this is not oriented. If a teenager does not want to study and falls out of the educational process, there are problems with motivation.

Psychologists distinguish 2 types of motivation : internal and external. The internal is formed by the needs of the student( curious, active, he likes expanding his own boundaries, etc.).

External motivation means getting some benefit in the future from classes( I'll study - I'll go to a prestigious university - I'll go out for decent work - I'll get a decent salary, etc.).

Reliable motivation - internal, and parents have a sense to work specifically on its development .The parent feels that he is interested in the child, what occupation brings him satisfaction, what he is ready to devote time.

To guide the student will help telecasts, rare magazines, museums, films. If the child understands what it gravitates to, the adult will tell you which university is preparing specialists for this profile - this is the incentive for learning.

Read more about the formation of the right motivation in this video.

Difficulties with a specific

subject Some schools sin in an abundance of disciplines of dubious necessity. If the object in your understanding refers to the category of secondary, it is not worth the nervous strain of the whole family.

Is there a body of knowledge for obtaining minimum certification? That's enough. If it's a profile discipline, help me figure it out. Usually the fact is that the student at the initial stage missed the explanation and launched the subject.

Parent's help is disciplined : find the place of the first failure, and rake in the dam, not forgetting about the promotion.

protest If the child was previously motivated to perform any task, promising a reward, then by a certain age he starts using this technique in reverse order, demanding the fulfillment of his requests in return for academic achievement.

The path is deadlocked, the solution is one - to establish relationships in the family, leading the child away from such a world view.

Health problems, stress, lack of sleep, chronic fatigue

This aspect in the learning process should never be underestimated. If the workload in the school is excessive for your child, do not help disciplinary measures( limiting additional pathogens, walking, adherence to work and rest), think about changing the curriculum.

The state of chronic stress will lead to the breakdown of the nervous system and a number of other diseases, so it makes sense to review the load. If the child does not want to study because of poor health, psychological advice to normal parents is not required. With the help of which sedatives for children you can fight with excitability read here.

Parental perfectionism

The child does not want to study Often in the reluctance to learn to blame for the wrong motivation. Parents force the child to do what he does not like

Any parent knows that the child is a separate person. But in practice, moms and dads often want to give the child the opportunity to realize their own dream.

Mom dreamed of a piano - and my daughter goes to music school, my father spent his youth in a football team - and his son was born in the sports school of the Olympic reserve.

This is only on one condition - if the child is the initiator of the .And even if it is a question of the hobby chosen by him personally, there are cases of increased demands from the parents. In the course are comparisons, promises, threats. ..

Such an approach will kill any good undertaking. The methods of undisguised pedagogical violence will lead to disgust for learning, and to undermining family relationships.

School program

Information on the structure of the educational material is given in the methodological manuals. When choosing an educational institution, parents rely on the conformity of the training program with their expectations, taking into account the child's propensities. In classes with strengthened mathematics, the child-humanitarians are unlikely to be able to manifest themselves and develop natural abilities.

The advice of a psychologist, if the child does not want to study, reduces more to correcting the parental than the child behavior.

Child psychologist Olga Makhovskaya, Minsk

The teenager does not want to study The main thing in teaching is deep cognitive motivation, interest. Successfully learn and develop children with good orientation behavior.

It is more important to praise for diligence and success, than to concentrate and blame for mistakes.

Modern parents work hard for the welfare of the family. But questions with learning all the same arise: what if the child does not want to learn from the first grade? Why does not the teenager want to study if all the conditions are created for him?


Apparently, the reasons for the reluctance to learn from the child are many. But whatever motivates the student for bad performance, this is followed by a request for help. Not about recovery, punishment, moralizing!

If the family has a trusting relationship that is built on sincere participation, the likelihood of tangible problems with the child's education is not so great.

The question "why does not the child want to learn?" Refers not to him alone. From the parent, the exposure and patience of is required, the ability and willingness to support by word and deed, to devote time and attention, to listen, to understand, to help find a way out.

And under no circumstances do not sacrifice the calmness and confidence of your child in the name of academic achievement: no one knows that it will come in handy from academic disciplines, but he will need a healthy psyche and a sense of self-confidence unequivocally.